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Fall sports are getting started. Parents are rushing from work, picking up dinner on the way, and eating while driving their youngsters to practice. Are sports really worth the extra time, money, and stress? Obviously many families think so. Sports offer exercise and training, practice in listening, following direction and strategizing, and the chance to excel in an area other than academics. Sports also help develop character traits useful in all aspects of life, such as determination, courage, commitment, sportsmanship, teamwork, and persistence. And the list could go on. But two of the most important aspects of sports, enjoyment and having FUN, are often forgotten. Parents come out to watch and cheer their children on. It is a family time. It is a time for parents and coaches to support the children and reinforce the values that possibly lead them to sign the children up for the sport in the first place. But what really happens at the game? Parents yell discouraging remarks, such as, come on try harder, why did you miss that ball? just wait 'till I get you home. Did they forget the children are there to have fun and are probably doing the best they can at the time? Most children feel badly enough about missing the ball, without the extra humiliation from the stands. Is the parent reliving his youth and feeling frustrated because he sees the child as an extension of himself? What about the person who is cursing at the referee for making a bad call? And then there is the shout to "take the other player out." Are we, as the adults, providing the role models that our children need? Are we helping develop positive character traits, pride in playing fair and doing one's best? Are we building self-esteem or tearing it down? The parent's role at the sporting event is to be encouraging. After the game, comment on a specific aspect of the game the player did well at or showed improvement in. Ask the player what she thought about the game and how she played. Offer constructive feedback. Offer to practice with your child. Be the type of parent spectator the child wants to be at every game, instead of the parent whose child says, "I hope she doesn't come. All she does is criticize me. Playing is not fun when she is there." Be your child's biggest cheerleader and you will win more than just a game. |
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